Awesome is the LORD Most High!

I wish you could hear me shouting cause I have not quit since about 10:oo this morning! Praise be to the Lord! I am through with CHEMO! Yes, you read that right! I am THROUGH with chemo.

This morning Michael and I left for the oncologist not really knowing what to expect but we surely were not expecting the news that I am through with Chemo. I think in the back of both of our minds we were preparing for news that would have been far worse. Michael will hold out and tell you this is what he thought but I cant even tell you that it was on my radar.

Let me give you a quick overview. My numbers have not dropped in 5 weeks. I had extra blood work last week that was sent to different labs at other cancer hospitals. All my labs came back by Friday confirming that my numbers were indeed between 7-8. There are three possibilities of what this means....
1.) I still have cancer and will continue on with same drugs to continue to fight it.
2.) My cancer has turned into persistent disease and has become more difficult to rid. This would require us changing chemo regiments.
3.) I have developed an EXTREMELY RARE antibody in my blood that conflicts with the antibodies used to get my blood counts and creates what they call a false-positive. (Ok--for you Doc's out there reading this....that is about the best I can do...Dr Rocconi--how did I do?)

Well you guessed it... They are going with number three! Praise God! This phenomenon is really hard to confirm and the test insurance does not cover and it cost $1000. SO, we are going to wait 3-5 weeks to see what my body does and will eventually have to have this but we are waiting right now.

So, what next..... I am THROUGH with Chemo. Because my numbers have been the same for the past 5 weeks, they believe that I have had my extra weeks that were initially needed. So, today was it. I will go weekly for the next few months to have lab work done to make sure I have no changes and after 6 months of no change I will be considered in full remission. PRAISE GOD!

Many of you have asked about the emotional side of this and I have lots to write. But, I can tell you that every morning these are the lyrics of the songs that I sing over and over. I have moved from these two songs to the song in the title. I am not blog savvy enough to make them play when the blog is loaded but please read the lyrics and know this is what has carried me through the past 4 months. It has been hard. But, the Lord has wrapped me in His arms even when I could not feel it.

Praise you in the Storm (Casting Crowns)

I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn I
will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the maker of heaven and earth

You Never Let Go--- Matt Redman

Even though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught
in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back I know you are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?

(Chorus:)
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
And I can see a light that is coming
for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth

Yes, I can see a light
that is coming f
or the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You

Wow...What a day!
Now I shouting...
AWESOME is the Lord Most High-- Chris Tomlin
Great are You, Lord
Mighty in strength
You are faithful
You will ever be

We will praise You
All of our days
It's for Your glory
We offer everything

Raise your hands, all you nations
Shout to God all creation
How awesome is the Lord most high

Where You send us
God, we will go
You're the answer
We want the world to know

We will trust You
When You call our name
Where You lead us
We'll follow all the way

We will praise You together
For now and forever
How awesome is the Lord most high

Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
How awesome is the Lord most high